Couple days ago I got a phone call from Megan, she was upset, yelling and talking so fast I just could not understand her. She’s driving home ranting and raving (I have told her before about driving while upset) and it took a little while to get her calmed down enough to get the picture of what happened.
Megan had gone to visit with her aunt. She called ahead to make sure it was okay and was told so-in-so was there. Megan didn’t know who this person was and had assumed it was a friend of her aunt. During dinner she got hit smack dab in the face, so to speak, as to who she was. Her father, still lacking in social graces, never bothered to introduce his new girlfriend to Megan.
I had told Jeff what had happened and he called to check on her. She had at least calmed down. Later on she told me to go read her blog, that she had used it to vent. I wasn’t sure what to expect before getting there, I was afraid she might have lashed out at her father, which could have had dire financial consequences for her. What I read was venomously angry post, lashing out at her sisters. It took very little time for me to understand why she was so angry with them, she loves them so much but hasn’t been talking to either one of them. She feels like she has lost them and now was afraid that she was going to lose her father to another woman.
I think a few other light bulbs came on for her. I have previously mentioned Megan’s behavior while she was living with us. She knew which buttons to push to make us mad, she tried her darnest to break us up on a number of occasions. She didn’t understand that not only did she have a father who loves her, she also has a step-father that loves her too. But she did everything she could to try and push him away because she was afraid her father wouldn’t love her any more. Later that evening she called to ask if she had been a “pain” (I’ve changed the actual words used) while living with us. I think it may have finally dawned on her.
So she took down the angry post and rewrote it. This time it wasn’t littered with profanity. This time it was much more on target with how she feels. You have to read through it, but there near bottom of the post, just before she mentions gardening and cooking, she finally said it ” I guess deep down I’m afraid that with a new girlfriend, he’ll forget about me.”
All of her fear came rolling out as anger. The pain she feels with the strained relationships she has with her sister’s came out as anger. She has tried on a number of occasions to patch those relationships, I think she has finally had to take the same position I have, the ball is in their court to mend the fences. I still hurt for her, she loves them just as much as I do. And she knows we love her too.
I just hope her father gets it too.
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