Archive for April, 2006

The Prayer Locket

Tuesday, April 11th, 2006

I found this prayer locket at a sample sale here at EWTN. In it, I put a small scrap of paper with a prayer request that I have asked for since the first time Megan came to live with us after the divorce.

I have days when I wonder if God is just toying with me. Over Christmas my prayer seemed to be answered. Maybe I’m not being specific enough, maybe it should be to give them both patience, tolerance and the wisdom to understand each other.

They both have identical personalities – strong willed, hardheaded. And they can butt heads with the best of them. They both pout in their own ways. I keep hearing the voice in my head “Go to your room if you’re going to pout” – and Megan does. She pouts with her father too and from the recounts that I’ve been told – it makes him mad too.

I have days when maybe I should pray for them to both grow up – then maybe I can quit being such a stick in the mud all the time.

So for now, I’ll have to keep the happy memories in my mind. My prayer remains the same even though I’m having difficulties understanding the “answer” I keep getting.

To it, I add that they come to realize that life is too short to harbor grudges or bad feelings.

From the Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 5:3-10):

  • Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. (v3)
  • Blessed are the meek: for they shall posses the land. (v4)
  • Blessed are they who mourn: for they shall be comforted. (v5)
  • Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after justice: for they shall have their fill. (v6)
  • Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy. (v7)
  • Blessed are the clean of heart: for they shall see God. (v8)
  • Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God. (v9)
  • Blessed are they that suffer persecution for justice’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. (v10)

Now if I can just feel like God is listening.

Into the Lion’s Den

Tuesday, April 4th, 2006

So many times I feel like I’m a lion tamer. For the most part the big cats will behave, get along and do what is asked of them. There is the element of fear that one of the cats could turn on you, doing great harm. Or the big cats could turn on each other, hurting each other. Big cats are very territorial. When the big cats are cooperating they are a wonder and a joy to watch.

Moment in time

Monday, April 3rd, 2006

Personal snapshot (something to look back on):

Favorite flower: Roses – lavender
Favorite color: Muted shades – mauve, denim, sage
Favorite food: General Tso Chicken
Favorite drink: Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper
Hobbies: Bowling, Photography
Favorite music: The Phantom of the Opera soundtrack
One thing I would do if I could afford it: Travel – Rome, Venice, Munich

In The Crossfire of Tenderhearts

Saturday, April 1st, 2006

So much to say – but I’m just at a loss for words. The parting shot was “I can’t believe daughter #2 was right, you did choose Jeff over her”. Emotional blackmail is so interesting, especially when the words being used are twisted. Daughter #2 chose not to come live with me – she was given the same option that Thanksgiving she flew down to Alabama.

Interesting how the Tenderheart hears what it wants to hear and not what was said. “We don’t want any” (Jeff standard message to telephone solicitors) became “We don’t want you” – long story, I just don’t have the emotional energy to tell it.